I don't know the answer to that, Lynne, but, I do feel it's our choice to use these gifts or chose NOT to. Free will.
It's a testament of mother love that you were there for her in such a positive, supportive way. I was blessed with a dad who could guide me, and now my son and grandson feel comfy with my guidance. For someone who "supposedly" has no gifts such as you to be there for her and look for the answers is such a blessing! (And I still say you have your very own set of gifts. They are just different than the more in your face kind!
)