This sounds like my own childhood minus the satanic stuff. I will just say what our parents do while we're children really screws up our heads BUT once you decide they're broken just like they "broke" you it gets alot easier to move on and heal (somewhat).
I still have "issues" from my childhood and I'm glad I have a patient man to deal with me. But until you open up totally to someone you aren't going to have somebody who will be patient. I get what you're saying I went through the "no god" phase but that don't mean you sold your soul. You're not emotionless you're just protecting yourself from any more hurt. Once you realize the past is gone and you have the power to get away from the abuse stuff will start to fall into place.
I still have "issues" from my childhood and I'm glad I have a patient man to deal with me. But until you open up totally to someone you aren't going to have somebody who will be patient. I get what you're saying I went through the "no god" phase but that don't mean you sold your soul. You're not emotionless you're just protecting yourself from any more hurt. Once you realize the past is gone and you have the power to get away from the abuse stuff will start to fall into place.