••A Full, Strange Story••

Sightless Doll

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I've shared this story a few times across the internet but never on a forum and never in its fullness. Of course, it may be dfficult to do since I don't fully understand it myself and it has been going on since before I was even born. I bring it now to a forum in hopes that I do get to reach an acceptable answer and course of action. Besides, it's getting as bad as it was when I was just a little kid before I had the blessing and even though I'm well equipped to handle it now, I'm not sure why this is happening.
I have been collecting pieces since I was around the age of twelve when I started to realize that there really was something a little bit more than weird about what was going on. This is what I have gathered through family testimonies, my own experiences, and the experiences of friends that I've had around me that have had their realities altered by the strange occurrences. I'm sorry it's extremely long, but perhaps my life centers a little too strongly around it.​
••~~~~~~~••​
I'll start off with a short synopsis of my family.​
On my dad's side of the family, both my grandfather and my aunt have told me that that were capable of astral projection. In fact, one night while my aunt slept in her room next to mine, she apparently watched me and even told me the next morning what I had been doing. My father himself has grown up with several hauntings and once he finally accepted my own gift I heard many of these from him.​
My mother's family, too, has quite the rich history. My grandmother is an energy healer and shaman who has told stories of encountering skinwalkers when she was young. My mom heself has had many encounters when she was young and is much more open minded about it.​
The only mental health issues in my family are depression from my father's side and OCD and ADHD from my mother's side.​
••~~~~~~~••​
Before I was born my mother said the house she was in was extremely haunted. Various appliances would turn themselves on, things would throw themselves off walls... you know. The classic poltergeist-type haunting. I was born in my grandmother's home, her as the midwife, and it was done naturally.​
Apparently when one of my aunts held me for the first time, she and my father some variation of this conversation:​
Her: You know how some people have souls older than others?​
Him: Yes. Jesus has the oldest soul. Why?​
Her: Because when I look into this child's eyes, I can feel she has a very old soul.​
Ever since I was very young I've had the "knowing", as Debi calls it. It started out as more of an empathic manner... or perhaps telepathic? But no one could ever surprise me. I'd just somehow know what they were planning or how they felt or what they wanted when, but that was just around people. When it came to spirits it was a different level of connection.​
One of my first memories was of when I was only three, and this is a story I've actually talked to my mother about and she, too, remembers it vividly. My sister and I shared a birthday growing up since they were so close as it was, but she had just turned one and I had turned three. I was obsessed with dinosaurs even then and of all the nick-knacks we got, I loved this little wind-up T-rex that my sister got. I, naturally, decided to play with it. Also a fan of slinkies, little kid me thought I could get the T-rex to walk down the stairs like my dad got slinkies to and when it would inevitably fall over on the first step down into the basement, I decided to "help" it down and throw it all the way to the bottom where it bounced off the wall and into the basement.​
Of course I went to retrieve it, but I remember there was something that made me slow down as I got to the bottom of the stairs and I could feel something powerful and not right inside. Now, the cellars when and where I grew up were just a small boiler room and sort-of storage area that could hardly fit much more than winter gear and a bit of food storage and they were hardly ever finished so of course there were wooden beams where a wall would be over the boiler room... and when I looked behind them I saw a man staring back at me. He was very tall, but wherever the light from the doorway came over him his body seemed to not exist... and he was looking calmly down at me. Clear as day I could see him just as you and I exist. I remember coming upstairs without looking for the toy, telling my mother there was a man in the basement.​
That wasn't the last thing I remember about early childhood either... nor that particular man.​
When I was around the age of five, living in a different house due to the nomadic tendencies hardwired into our family, I started to have repetitive nightmares where I would find myself in a void black labyrinth. Every so often a mirror would break the consistency of the black and through it I could see that I was older. I wasn't a little kid in the reflections. Yet I could never look long enough because I would hear claws on hard ground and see a giant, white, diseased, and wolfish being coming at me. At first it was a large beast with fingers rather than paws and red eyes, but each time I had the dream it would look more human, more diseased, eyes filled with cataracts. Sick. It would chase me through the labyrinth... and then I'd wake up and sit up in bed, but it was like the nightmare was following me out.​
And I don't mean sleep paralysis. It felt like I was drowning in evil and I couldn't speak from fright, but I was able to move, hide under my blankets, press myself against the headboard... but there was always a tall man in the corner of the room when I woke up. He'd tell me that no matter how much I ran, no matter where I'd go, he would find me. That I was his.​
Then I'd get sick. For days after I wouldn't be able to stand. I'd get fevers and chills and didn't have the strength to stand. I'd start getting better, have the nightmare again, hear him promising me those things, then get sick all over again.​
It got so bad that my mom called someone over to give me a blessing. After that the nightmares stopped, I didn't see that man again for years, and I stopped getting sick.​
My sister quickly showed that she had a knack for it as well. We'd both sit and listen to stories that an old lady told in this herbal shop my grandmother owned, but when we told others about her we were reprimanded as liars and told that the lady didn't exist. My sister still remembers her as well.​
The oldest of my two brothers, younger than my sister and I, seems to have inherited my grandmother's skill over energy healing- something I myself do on occasion- and my youngest brother is a strong empath. Unfortunately, my sister is scared of her gift and has fought hard to break it and give excuses to let herself live a normal life.​
I won't give the details of every encounter we've had in our lives because we've had far too many. From scrubbing black mold from a dry wall with bleach and having it reappear the next day, to my mom's foot being grabbed by an entity after my dad tried to chase it down thinking it was an intruder, we've had a pretty eventful life. Instead, I'm going to focus on what I cannot understand. The man.
(Continued in comments)​
 
I know that those who are sensitive tend to have more experiences in general and since it runs in our blood, our family tends to be a lighthouse or that one house on the block that's always loud with a party inviting everyone in Gatsby-style. It's even more understandable when my father came from an abusive family and took that anger and tyrannical control with him into his own family life. My sister turned to drugs, alcohol, and bedroom activities to cope, I turned to my abilities to nurture and hone them, and my brothers learned his anger and cruelty. My mom gave up even being a mother and wife, and buried herself in work. With all that negativity, I understand why these things happen in my family. Why my dad got possessed just last month. Why they torment my sister. And why I can see and hear them but cannot be harmed by them like the others can. What I don't understand, however, is that man and another aspect of my life that I want to give a disclaimer for.

My disclaimer:
I don't know who these people are. It sounds insane even to me and I don't even know if they are connected to the man. I don't know how any of this connects, I do not fear any of it, and I have prepared a lot to make sure that I keep an upper hand against it. I'm not paranoid, but after having my house broken into twice, caught people in their truck taking photos of me as I walked, then having that same truck follow me on my nightly walks among other things... I'm definitely careful about them.

••~~~~~~~••

The Man

We'll start with this demon. While I was able to see his face the first time I saw him when I was three, since then it's as though it's lost in oscillation. I can never see his eyes or what hairstyle he has, if any. All I can see is his thin lips almost always in a calm or thoughtful smile, but there's something unsettling about it that I can't shake. He's unusually tall, hit the doorframe tall, but everything is normal about his proportions in relation to his height. He is not bad looking otherwise, fairly normal, and he's the only entity I've always been able to see with perfect clarity with my own eyes.

Of course he came twice when I was younger, but disappeared after the blessing for a long time. It wasn't until I was around eleven or twelve and started to question where my spirituality resided religiously that he returned. I was researching psychic mediums and the paranormal at about 3:00am. I had pretty severe insomnia when I was younger (still do unless I put myself in a meditative state) so I was wide awake. Besides, it was summer and I could sleep during the day if I wanted to.

I had been moved into the basement because it was the house both my aunt and I saw a noose in a few weeks apart from one another (me in a "back of the eye" vision and my aunt apparently as a solid object) and whenever my aunt and grandfather fought, things would be thrown around upstairs and they were both scared of staying down there any longer. So I gave my aunt my room and I moved down into the unfinished basement. There was a sheet pinned up along one of the ceiling beams to separate my room from the storage area and there was a slightly more finished room at the bottom of the stairs going into the basement that only had half a wall to separate my room from. The stairs came down with a wall, leaving a corner behind it dark, but my sister had a kiddie pool with her turtle in that other room so there was always a heat lamp on.

I remember looking out the window and thinking to myself "I'm still kind of hyper. I want to go out and run around..." But I shut my laptop anyway. It was still on my bed and I debated going outside or turning the night lamp on the turtle (a dull red light for any of you that haven't owned a reptile) so I could lie still until I forced myself to sleep... but movement caught my eye.

At first I thought I was more tired than I thought and that the shadows were just getting bigger and smaller because of tired eyes dilating and restricting rapidly, but then I noticed it was just behind the cutout behind the stairs... and that there was the unmistakable shape of shoulders and a head... only it was almost gaseous rather than a solid form. It looked like it was trying to retreat back behind the cutout, but when I sat forward to focus on it, it suddenly stopped.

I've never felt something similar to this before or since, but it was like all of my energy was suddenly ripped from my body and I actually collapsed back down on my bed. Where I had been hyper seconds earlier I was then fighting to keep conscious as I saw him move toward me and solidify. It was the man. Just like I had seen those times before... and I saw his smile right before I passed out completely. I remember I had a dream that night where I stood in front of him and he told me some things that I can't remember, something about my soul, and that he wanted me to hand myself over to him. He was with two others, one average for a man, the other shorter and more stout. Both wore white masks and said nothing the entire time. Of course, after asking a question and getting my answer, I told him no and I woke up the next day. My laptop was now under my bed, unlike how I left it, and I was in my covers, unlike I had been the night before. I had no idea how.

I'd discount all of this as a dream... but years later it got even WEIRDER.

I made two friends at different times entirely by accident. One I started dating, the other was my best friend. Well, one night my best friend... we'll call him Blade for his knife and sword collection... began to tell me about something that had started to happen to him nearly every night.

And he described the man, the two men with masks, and a fourth girl who apparently wore a rather contemporary plague-doctor's mask. They stood around him and the man would look like he was talking but Blade couldn't hear what they were saying.

Spooked, I spoke to my now-ex - we'll call him the INTP. Because good god INTPs are... unique.

Well, his response was to tell me that his female friend had told him the exact same story that I had that night with him asking me to give myself over... and that she had told him "yes".

Long story short, while I was practicing honing my gift and tuning myself in before I learned to defend myself, the man was there almost every night in my room again until I could- once again- hardly stand and stay awake... and I started coughing up blood.

I had a Wiccan friend help me that time and she taught me how to upkeep myself to keep them away. Since then, the only times I have seen the man is outside, at least several houses away from me and just watching. It's very rare to see him, though. Maybe about three times a year.
 
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The People?
Now this is what really confuses me to no end.​
I have no idea when it began, but several years ago I started to get strange emails and messages from friends' accounts that they never sent themselves. Sometimes they were poems, sometimes formatted like quotes that weren't quotes, but all of them were obviously written by the same person using the same form of speech, punctuation, word choice, and so on. All of them were directed to me, telling me of future events, people I would soon meet, who to trust, and detailed things I should do. Like an odd hacker seer. At first I thought it was just a few of my friends pulling an ARG prank. This was back in... ninth grade and still happens to this day? So around six or seven years of this going on... I highly doubt now that it's a prank with the lengths it's gone to.​
Recently I had a friend check their IP login history for me on the site where their account was used to send these messages, and though they live in Australia- I live in the U.S- and never have to log into their account, there were several unexplained logins from his own IP at times he was usually asleep or at work for a few days leading up to the day I was sent the messages. So they're likely masking their IP and covering their tracks. Of the messages sent to me, here were a couple.​
"Shine once more, before the end. Return to the stars."​
"It will get cold and dark, don't be scared, it's what they want."​
After several similar messages that slowly got more and more... dark. Telling me to find someone and that the "scythe is duller than it looks".​
After telling them I wasn't going to run around like a chicken with its head cut off to follow cryptic clues and cloak and dagger nonesense... their only response was "You will do nicely. It was nice talking to you again."​
Whatever the hell "you will do nicely" means. Kinda creepy, honestly.​
No messages came after that and I had my friend change their password.​
And this was the most recent after two years of silence from the one who sent my cryptic tips and encouragement... but they aren't the only one involved. Several years ago while I was making notes about this very thing, my house was broken into twice. Nothing was stolen, nothing out of place... except for in my room. Everything had been meticulously pulled from shelves one time. Even papers I had thrown in the trash unfolded and placed on the ground. The second time a similar ransacking happened, my computer was broken in the mayhem. Nothing was ever stolen.​
When I was walking with a friend- I'll call her Winter- she pointed to a white truck and said "Those guys are taking pictures of us". And sure enough they were. I thought nothing of it. Maybe they were taking pictures of the neighborhood or selfies or something. It wasn't until a couple of weeks later on one of my nightly walks that I suddenly got this strong feeling like someone was telling me "Hide in the bushes, NOW." So, like everyone who has that sixth sense start screaming... I hid in the bushes like a good girl.​
Then a vehicle parked where a vehicle should never have to park. It was before any houses had been built there and there were just empty lots, a farm down the street, and a steep hill nestled around a small memorial cemetery that I visited nightly (good place to recharge and meditate. Perfect place for stargazing. Not a spooky cemetery at all). Yet they parked... got out of their vehicle... and I swore I heard them talking about trying to find some girl. They looked around for a bit, gave up, and got back into their vehicle. As they drove off, I could finally see that it was the same white truck as before.​
And that's not an isolated instance.​
I once saw the same car circle around me EIGHT times. Just to be safe I hid away again. The car circled again, slower, but before it could come around a tenth time I went a different direction than usual and got home without incident.​
I do know this may be connected to something to happen to yet another friend I met by happenstance with capabilities similar to my own. We connected through discussion about these odd similarities in our lives... and then he started talking about this woman he met that was asking him to come with her for some kind of special training. That she'd passed him several times in his life before finally coming to him with these answers.​
I told him not to trust her. It sounded suspicious to me. He disappeared for a few couple of months and gave everyone else a bullshit excuse for why he was gone. When he came back he was almost... different somehow. Refused to discuss anything further with me and outright refused to talk to me at all.​
••~~~~~~~••​
So if anyone can offer some insight or advice, I'd love to hear it. I know this was pretty long so I understand if no one wants to read through it, but this is my life and it's insane and I'd like a dose of understanding.​
 
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It seems to me that you are a "targeted" individual. I believe there are some humans at the top who work directly with nonhuman powerful entities. Their goal? Power and control over everything and everyone. That's why you are being followed and photographed. You are being watched and studied. They know you have gifts, and they want to use you and your power to fulfill their agenda. There is a possible connection with aliens here, and I do believe aliens and demons are the same thing. If you google "targeted individuals" you will see stories of other people who have been followed and harassed their entire lives. They have even been drugged without knowing it..creating hallucinations, panic, and physical pain.
I have had some similar experiences. One involved an airplane that just about scuffed the top of my house it was flying so low. It dove and circled around my house for 45 minutes straight. I was scared to death. The pilot was so close I could see his face every time he flew over, and he was looking straight at me. He was not smiling. I made my girls get in the car and drove down the road because I feared he would crash into our house and kill us. It was very strange.
 
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It seems to me that you are a "targeted" individual. I believe there are some humans at the top who work directly with nonhuman powerful entities. Their goal? Power and control over everything and everyone. That's why you are being followed and photographed. You are being watched and studied. They know you have gifts, and they want to use you and your power to fulfill their agenda. There is a possible connection with aliens here, and I do believe aliens and demons are the same thing. If you google "targeted individuals" you will see stories of other people who have been followed and harassed their entire lives. They have even been drugged without knowing it..creating hallucinations, panic, and physical pain.
I have had some similar experiences. One involved an airplane that just about scuffed the top of my house it was flying so low. It dove and circled around my house for 45 minutes straight. I was scared to death. The pilot was so close I could see his face every time he flew over, and he was looking straight at me. He was not smiling. I made my girls get in the car and drove down the road because I feared he would crash into our house and kill us. It was very strange.
I think this is a bit more sinister than gangstalking. The final objective of gangstalking is to either get you institutionalized or imprisoned, discredit you, or drive you to insanity or suicide.

I think that Sightless has enemies in pretty high places if people are trying to look for her for God knows what reason. Gang stalkers won’t try to directly engage a subject like getting out of their vehicle to look for you.
 
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o_O The antidote for gaslighting is to be aware that it is exactly what’s being done. Gaslighting only works if you are unaware you’re being gaslighted.
I do know what they are trying to do. And that's why I noted that I'm not scared of them. I just don't understand why they are doing these things or what they want from me in particular.

They could have hurt me on many occasions. I could have been kidnapped. I could disappear and if it weren't for my preparations for such a thing no one would know what happened to me, but they haven't. I have remained safe. And I apparently have a mysterious friend who gives me heads up when something is about to happen. I am well equipped for getting through this, but I am also a very curious woman and a very ambitious one and I wish to get to the bottom of this and understand its fullness. Thus the quote in my signature. I am one who turns toward the terror and chooses to understand it.
 
I have attached three screenshots from the last conversation with the hacker. I will warn you that there is a bit of cussing from me and the reason behind my vehemence is simply that, as I mentioned, there have been people that have led me on wild goose chases before. However, I ask you to note that my friend has chosen to be a female and has been open about it with me for some time. I'm one of the only three people who know. This person refers to my friend as a 'he', which my friend was actually a bit upset about when I sent her the conversation.

I changed the hue of the website and blotted out both my username and my friend's, plus my friend's name in order to protect her and protect my private life online.

While I have had more conversations with this hacker through Google and another forum, I don't have any screenshots from any of the accounts they used and since they were years ago I'm not sure I'll be able to track them down. However, I do have a printed paper with some of their earliest messages copy-pasted down in my grimoire from back when I was collecting every lead. Most of it is nonsense from other people's dead ends, however, so it's not very comprehensive or usable here since younger me was terrible at keeping documents and didn't even put who said what.

C535E001-AA67-469A-A6ED-0A09953BCC48.png 79F02981-1756-4EB3-9930-AB0F91042261.png C447E125-DDFF-4897-9BE1-43F3ED8237E8.png
 
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I think it was Lewis Carroll who wrote the wise line “oh the horror of the moment I shall never forget!” & the reply “you shall, if you don’t make a memorandum of it”

Wise words that I live by. Why turn to redigest terror if there are more pleasant things to digest?
 
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I think this is a bit more sinister than gangstalking. The final objective of gangstalking is to either get you institutionalized or imprisoned, discredit you, or drive you to insanity or suicide.

I think that Sightless has enemies in pretty high places if people are trying to look for her for God knows what reason. Gang stalkers won’t try to directly engage a subject like getting out of their vehicle to look for you.
Gangstalkers are only a small part of it. They are the grunts. It's a big operation that I believe involves humans and nonhumans working together for evil.
 
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