Sometimes I have read and heard, that our 'soul contracts' aren't always positive ones. Still there is something there to learn...I think unfortunately you could have been experiencing this kind of soul contract with your ex. You might have said you'd find her, and she might have promised to allow herself to be found, but then realized she wasn't going to keep good on anything more after she'd been found. Hopefully the contract is broken now, for both your sakes, so you each can move on into a more positive circle of souls that better suits you each.
No one has ever confirmed this for me, but I suspect I've got this kind of contract with my mother. I remember laying in bed as a little girl thinking she couldn't possibly be my mother, a 3 year old doesn't think those things. I'd also dream of her but that she'd be my mean sister rather than mother. Still to this day that is how I think of her. And, in this lifetime that really is kind of what she is, since I was also reared 60% by my grandparents. I'm really like my grandma's 'change of life baby' & my uncle and mother treat me like I'm the baby, and are very jealous & my grandparents have told me that I'm more of a daughter to them. But no one fills a child's head with this talk. So I can't tell if being abandoned as a newborn until I was 2, programmed the idea she wasn't my mother but my sister into my head, or if it was like that before and repeats again to both of our displeasure. I think the later, because her evil runs deep & has no good explanation- and her connection with me was broken from the time of my conception- so it's not 'personal' it just always was, if that makes sense? She's very different with my brother, better & connected to him so much that he's 25 & able bodied and still lives at home and acts like he's 12 because she babies him so.
These soul contracts affect our spirit guide connections as well, as if you go back to the beginning of this thread, I explain how my 1600s guide & myself were drawn back together.